Havent given up yet.
Meanwhile, here are some modeling photos. Photo credit; Brittany McGinley.
Friday, August 7, 2015
new direction
Plan D is underway.
Havent given up yet.
Meanwhile, here are some modeling photos. Photo credit; Brittany McGinley.
Havent given up yet.
Meanwhile, here are some modeling photos. Photo credit; Brittany McGinley.
Monday, July 27, 2015
low battery
I received the invite from Russia and can't go.
I no longer have any of my legal documents and officially can't afford it. Prior to the burglary however I could have pursued an academic education.
That said, i have come to the decision that it is a better idea for me to stick around l.a. for my potential art education. There are fantastic teachers here and I found some great friends. I am grateful.
In losing my entire life savings i've realized that perhaps i should have spent the money i worked so hard to earn more... because now it's all gone. All my hard work, investment and time and dream, Gone. It's time for me to live a more sustainable life. I'm going to change some things to steady up.
I no longer have any of my legal documents and officially can't afford it. Prior to the burglary however I could have pursued an academic education.
That said, i have come to the decision that it is a better idea for me to stick around l.a. for my potential art education. There are fantastic teachers here and I found some great friends. I am grateful.
In losing my entire life savings i've realized that perhaps i should have spent the money i worked so hard to earn more... because now it's all gone. All my hard work, investment and time and dream, Gone. It's time for me to live a more sustainable life. I'm going to change some things to steady up.
Wednesday, July 22, 2015
When all that glitters gets gone
I woke up this morning to move my car and find my life savings, personal and legal documents, and jewelry stolen.
These items were In my car because I move too much and the place I'm currently residing has no locks. Every time I tried to lock up, the lock was compromised providing no indoor security, there were also frequent visits from strangers.
I was going to touch base on this weeks blog on the subject of financing education. To keep it short since I have a lot to deal with right now, no matter how many friends you have in the system you will not receive an education if you cannot pay for it. Which, really, is appropriate. We do not live off favors, it's always an exchange. If something seems too convenient and easy, look behind the curtain, there is an alternate motive lingering there and the likelyhood is that you won't like it.
These items were In my car because I move too much and the place I'm currently residing has no locks. Every time I tried to lock up, the lock was compromised providing no indoor security, there were also frequent visits from strangers.
I was going to touch base on this weeks blog on the subject of financing education. To keep it short since I have a lot to deal with right now, no matter how many friends you have in the system you will not receive an education if you cannot pay for it. Which, really, is appropriate. We do not live off favors, it's always an exchange. If something seems too convenient and easy, look behind the curtain, there is an alternate motive lingering there and the likelyhood is that you won't like it.
Tuesday, July 14, 2015
Jungle boogie
I followed up with Repin regarding my visa/invite. The lady responsible looked into it and found that the guy responsible for sending it out never sent it out. So we're giving it another go. I heard back from her on Monday. (Yesterday).
Plan B is well underway. I've built a lot in Los angles in terms of means to survival and relationships. I've set myself some other exciting goals so life will not feel as though it's on a standstill. I'm still pursuing full time education with a big question mark of how to fund it. One step at a time. Meanwhile, I'm creating and working. Post photos soon, Internet and comp are still issues.
That's all folks.
Plan B is well underway. I've built a lot in Los angles in terms of means to survival and relationships. I've set myself some other exciting goals so life will not feel as though it's on a standstill. I'm still pursuing full time education with a big question mark of how to fund it. One step at a time. Meanwhile, I'm creating and working. Post photos soon, Internet and comp are still issues.
That's all folks.
Wednesday, July 1, 2015
Waiting game
I still have not heard from Russia with the invite. I'm searching for plan b. Plan c involves me moving to Hawaii and spending the rest of my days stealing piña coladas.
Receiving the invite and attaining the visa is only the first part of a very arduous goal, the second part is seeking funding. I cant seize studying the language though, All be it in a slow, self taught, haphazardous way.
I've started and am continuing on a new series of paintings called 'the cutter'. I'm also getting acquainted with the beauty of delegating. No man, I cannot master everything, yes I need everything well done. Ok, I'll pay you. Yes, I'll do some research to make sure you're not ripping me off. Would you like some popcorn?
Also worth noting but fairly irrelevant to art; California has free medical clinics. The service I've encountered is quality, and although they cannot provide the same health benefits someone with health insurance can, they are there. I am delving further into the system of health insurance and believe I can be provided for with limited benefits. Kaiser has a program which it rotates its doctors from their regular rounds at paid medical facilities to the free ones. Thanks to them. Also, although we haven't been able to diagnose exactly what occurred with my arm (there is some speculation), it has been regaining its mobility and strength slowly but surely. Good job body at doing your job.
And, and event in the U.S. Worth mentioning, congrats to the gay/lesbian community for attaining equal marriage rights in the u.s. Your relationship can now be a three some with the govt as well. :)
Excuse the irregularity on the posts, I still don't have a computer or the Internet. It happens, I think the world will survive, also, for whatever reason the blog won't let me post photos via iPad. When I get to a comp I'll post some. Meanwhile, да сведаня.
Receiving the invite and attaining the visa is only the first part of a very arduous goal, the second part is seeking funding. I cant seize studying the language though, All be it in a slow, self taught, haphazardous way.
I've started and am continuing on a new series of paintings called 'the cutter'. I'm also getting acquainted with the beauty of delegating. No man, I cannot master everything, yes I need everything well done. Ok, I'll pay you. Yes, I'll do some research to make sure you're not ripping me off. Would you like some popcorn?
Also worth noting but fairly irrelevant to art; California has free medical clinics. The service I've encountered is quality, and although they cannot provide the same health benefits someone with health insurance can, they are there. I am delving further into the system of health insurance and believe I can be provided for with limited benefits. Kaiser has a program which it rotates its doctors from their regular rounds at paid medical facilities to the free ones. Thanks to them. Also, although we haven't been able to diagnose exactly what occurred with my arm (there is some speculation), it has been regaining its mobility and strength slowly but surely. Good job body at doing your job.
And, and event in the U.S. Worth mentioning, congrats to the gay/lesbian community for attaining equal marriage rights in the u.s. Your relationship can now be a three some with the govt as well. :)
Excuse the irregularity on the posts, I still don't have a computer or the Internet. It happens, I think the world will survive, also, for whatever reason the blog won't let me post photos via iPad. When I get to a comp I'll post some. Meanwhile, да сведаня.
Monday, June 22, 2015
What is left is right what is right is damaged.
I've had the good fortune this week to meet with a collector and we had a wonderful dinner and exchanged our thoughts on many topics. By the end of the night she purchased a painting of mine. I'm very fortunate to truly enjoy the company of the collectors I've gotten to meet, they feel like friends who happen to like the work I do. Anyhow, I'm going to touch base upon one of the topics discussed which is the subject matter of what I enjoy painting and my current process.
I love painting my landscapes and still lives, however, those are not my forte so I don't publicize them much. The body of my work evolves people. My obsessions range from topic to topic and my fascination with key individuals in selected fields inspire me to create. One of my ongoing interests has been dancers. I've drawn them a good deal but I cannot create a body of work based solely on observation. I'm big on knowing and experiencing the world someone comes from, I love my research and I think the production of a work of art is a lot richer for it. It's fun for me. You get to know your subject beyond presentation and get to feel for their story; battles, wins, loses, psychological and physical quirks. It's an appreciation for the human experience. Also, the more I gain the acquaintance of and respect an individual the harder I work at making the work better and pushing myself to the max. You feel as though you have to do it justice and I can't do that unless I push myself to do the best job I'm capable of . In the end, the painting really takes on a life of its own.
In a world where our existence is based so much upon the fabricated, experiencing something genuine and capturing it in art is a slice of truth. I need that honesty in what I create.
I'll now attempt to tackle the tornado which took place this week.
I still have not received my Russian visa. I've stopped studying the language for the most part because of my partial loss in faith that I'll actually have the opportunity to study abroad and because of the enormous amount of stuff I have to I get done.
This weeks task was finishing 4 paintings for an upcoming gallery show. This was a hard for many reasons; i've moved twice, i've modeled, and i've been dealing with a myriad of injuries, my leg, so I couldn't run and let out stress/energy for over a week, and mid week my right arm went partially numb... And stayed that way. Meaning... Mobility was not easy as it became swollen and felt like I was lifting a horse every time I moved it. While this sounds impressive the fact that it was an empty tea cup takes my gold medal away. I had to paint with my left hand. The emotional arm is regaining strength but is not yet at 100. Big lazy.
My computer also called it quits on life. I guess this means that humans may outlive machines... But we all know that's not gonna happen. When machines manufacture machines I doubt they are going to make it out of jello (unless it's synthesized jello). Bugs eat that stuff.
'Do Brasil' -portuguese
20"x16"
oil on panel
Monday, June 15, 2015
obssesive patterns
This past week has been mostly dedicated to commission work (and modeling). I received a commission from a wonderful lady in New York to draw 3 portraits. It has been a pleasure working with her and i'm very fortunate.
That said, I will now go into the process i currently go through. First, I get the expectations, dates and numbers on the clear. I draw up thumbnails exploring various compositions, shapes/value relationships and I let the customer pick one/give feedback and then pay. I then do a nearly finished drawing giving a better idea of what the final product will look like (pencil)... very time consuming but necessary, specially when you're working with pen and ink... there are very few revisions that can be done with this medium and none of them involve taking away or correcting. So at this stage I take some final notes from the customer before i head into the final product.
After approval I start the final drawing. I use a specific kind of paper which is very delicate, so god forbid i get it dirty, bend it, rip it, put tape on it, etc. Even the pen sometimes causes acts of violence on the surface. It's rice paper, and it's textured, so i also have to know how the drawing is going to look on the paper so that a big chunk of texture doesn't fall in the middle of a portrait... better leave that stuff floating around the sides. Obviously the surface the drawing paper itself lies on top of matters as well, whether its hard or slightly padded, smooth, etc will give the pen park a different flow. The pen itself needs to have even pressure throughout lest it 'bleed'... which, if it's abad bleed you'd have to start a new drawing. Ill also mention that inevitably an error will occur, i've never had a 'perfect' drawing. The trick to getting around those is making it look intentional. Most of the time you can pull it off... sometimes you can't. I once had a drawing i was working on for a show, it was fairly large and difficult... it was... what... 40"x15" or something... i was touching things up at the end and i think i heard someone calling me, or something attracted my attention and i left the pen on the paper for a second too long... there was a blot. I spent alot of hours trying to correct the error, changing the compositon, value arrangement, markmaking (the blot was not the type of language i was using) and finally... the drawing got trashed. So it happens. Lastly i'll mention that not all references are created equal. I've mostly received ok references, but sometimes they really tilt more on the direction of not... when even upon request the client cannot provide a better alternative i sometimes find myself combining two or three references to get the portrait i need.
These drawings don't take hours, they take days/weeks to finish because it is a slow build of of very fine lines. The repitition of the pattern alone takes hours of focus since i try to get it somewhat evenly spaced and pressured. The correct drawing has to be there, and also the pen has to be in it's ideal state of ink.. meaning, new pens show up with stronger lines, older pens you can get away with finer ones and are more sensitive to pressure. They all bleed if you don't take care.
Anyhow... back on point. When the commission is finished (if its a couple at once i wait until they are all done, so i can feel free to touch up others as i finish some to make sure they feel like a unit and a sort of communication is going on between them) i send final pix, hopefully get an approval then ship it off to its new owner. (i added this in a rush just now... i'll organize it properly later.)
For what it's worth, the final product does look really nice and i'm super excited to see what i'll end up doing with this medium in terms of pattern, application, process etc. I know i'm barely at the tip of the iceberg with these.
I'm not posting the current drawings since they are commissions, when all is done i'll ask permission.
Another word.... I do not have a big name and am starting in my career... if i charged hourly for the amount of work that is going into these i'd get less then a dollar an hr. Whether that's right or wrong at this point is irrelevant, it's important that i'm at least getting my art moving and getting paid for it... people don't know how much work goes into these... they wouldn't be willing to pay for it. Specially if you're just starting out.
Thought number two... As i wait for my russian student visa and details. I'm considering where else i may travel, and how to continue making ends meet in other countries for temporary stays. I will always have to regroup in Cali and New York... but meanwhile, i can still linger, search and discover and make great art... whether it sells or not is another question.
My goal, as an artist, is to perfect my craft and always work as honestly as i can and to the best of my ability. My direction in life is one of endless study and travel.
No photos today again, i'm using a friends computer. Gotta go.
That said, I will now go into the process i currently go through. First, I get the expectations, dates and numbers on the clear. I draw up thumbnails exploring various compositions, shapes/value relationships and I let the customer pick one/give feedback and then pay. I then do a nearly finished drawing giving a better idea of what the final product will look like (pencil)... very time consuming but necessary, specially when you're working with pen and ink... there are very few revisions that can be done with this medium and none of them involve taking away or correcting. So at this stage I take some final notes from the customer before i head into the final product.
After approval I start the final drawing. I use a specific kind of paper which is very delicate, so god forbid i get it dirty, bend it, rip it, put tape on it, etc. Even the pen sometimes causes acts of violence on the surface. It's rice paper, and it's textured, so i also have to know how the drawing is going to look on the paper so that a big chunk of texture doesn't fall in the middle of a portrait... better leave that stuff floating around the sides. Obviously the surface the drawing paper itself lies on top of matters as well, whether its hard or slightly padded, smooth, etc will give the pen park a different flow. The pen itself needs to have even pressure throughout lest it 'bleed'... which, if it's abad bleed you'd have to start a new drawing. Ill also mention that inevitably an error will occur, i've never had a 'perfect' drawing. The trick to getting around those is making it look intentional. Most of the time you can pull it off... sometimes you can't. I once had a drawing i was working on for a show, it was fairly large and difficult... it was... what... 40"x15" or something... i was touching things up at the end and i think i heard someone calling me, or something attracted my attention and i left the pen on the paper for a second too long... there was a blot. I spent alot of hours trying to correct the error, changing the compositon, value arrangement, markmaking (the blot was not the type of language i was using) and finally... the drawing got trashed. So it happens. Lastly i'll mention that not all references are created equal. I've mostly received ok references, but sometimes they really tilt more on the direction of not... when even upon request the client cannot provide a better alternative i sometimes find myself combining two or three references to get the portrait i need.
These drawings don't take hours, they take days/weeks to finish because it is a slow build of of very fine lines. The repitition of the pattern alone takes hours of focus since i try to get it somewhat evenly spaced and pressured. The correct drawing has to be there, and also the pen has to be in it's ideal state of ink.. meaning, new pens show up with stronger lines, older pens you can get away with finer ones and are more sensitive to pressure. They all bleed if you don't take care.
Anyhow... back on point. When the commission is finished (if its a couple at once i wait until they are all done, so i can feel free to touch up others as i finish some to make sure they feel like a unit and a sort of communication is going on between them) i send final pix, hopefully get an approval then ship it off to its new owner. (i added this in a rush just now... i'll organize it properly later.)
For what it's worth, the final product does look really nice and i'm super excited to see what i'll end up doing with this medium in terms of pattern, application, process etc. I know i'm barely at the tip of the iceberg with these.
I'm not posting the current drawings since they are commissions, when all is done i'll ask permission.
Another word.... I do not have a big name and am starting in my career... if i charged hourly for the amount of work that is going into these i'd get less then a dollar an hr. Whether that's right or wrong at this point is irrelevant, it's important that i'm at least getting my art moving and getting paid for it... people don't know how much work goes into these... they wouldn't be willing to pay for it. Specially if you're just starting out.
Thought number two... As i wait for my russian student visa and details. I'm considering where else i may travel, and how to continue making ends meet in other countries for temporary stays. I will always have to regroup in Cali and New York... but meanwhile, i can still linger, search and discover and make great art... whether it sells or not is another question.
My goal, as an artist, is to perfect my craft and always work as honestly as i can and to the best of my ability. My direction in life is one of endless study and travel.
No photos today again, i'm using a friends computer. Gotta go.
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